Best House M.D Quotes

"Do you notice how all the self-sacrificing women in history; Joan of Arc, Mother Theresa, --can't think of any others--; they all die alone. The men, on the other hand, get so much fuzz, it's crazy."

"I don't ask why patients lie, I just assume they all do."

"I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone, that someone is probably the last person you should ask."

"I was never that great a math, but next to nothing is higher than nothing, right?"

"Humanity is overrated."

"Patients sometimes get better. You have no idea why, but unless you give a reason they won't pay you."

"If he gets better, I'm right, if he dies, you're right."

"There is not a thin line between love and hate. There is --- in fact --- a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate."

“Bros before hos, man.”

"I thought I'd get your theories, mock them, then embrace my own. The usual."

"If your life's no more important than anyone else's, sign your donor card and kill yourself."

"Lies are like children: they’re hard work, but it’s worth it because the future depends on them."

"No, if you talk to God you're religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic."

"You know how they say 'you can't live without love'? Well, oxygen is even more important."